Christmas Eve 2010

So I've started a blog.  Who would have thought it?  I guess I just wanted a place to write down my thoughts and feelings.  So anyway...here goes! 

It's Christmas Eve and I was up early -  as usual.  A lot on my mind and couldn't sleep.  So much has happened in the past year.  So much tragedy and sadness.  But isn't that the way it seems to go the older one gets?  I'm sitting here trying to focus on the positives...I'm still employed.  I still have a husband.  I still have a home. 

What I don't have, that I lost this past year, is one of  my brother-in-laws - my sister's husband.  And I'm still sad.  Sad for my sister, sad for my nieces, sad for his family...sad for all of us. I know that only time will help them heal.  But I wish I could do more...I wish she and his daughters didn't have to go through this first Christmas without him.  It breaks my heart.  They are all strong women and I know they'll be alright.  I just wish I could take their hurt away.  I miss the Christmases we used to have when they were little and when our Mom and Dad were still here.

That's another things that sucks about getting older.  You miss that magical feeling of Christmas you had as a kid.  You miss all the people that are no longer here to share it with you.  It's just not the same anymore.  But, like I said, I have to focus on the positives and what I still have....my Little Man Drew.   There is nothing better than having a 2 1/2 year old to make you feel the magic of Christmas again!

We all need to remember what this whole Christmas thing is about.  It's not about the presents, and the parties, and the food.  It's about the birth of our Saviour.  A promise that was made and given.

So, I wish whomever reads this a beautiful and blessed Christmas.  I wish for you all good things to come.  I pray any of your hurt or worry is lightened.  I hope you have a magical Christmas...

And I promise that not all my musings will be sad...